Sunday, August 22, 2010

Loosing Jack And the Power of Prayer

So last night a shock came to our little farm as at 12:30am last night I went out to tuck in the goats and found Jack had passed on. Now this shocked me and hubby as Jack was doing great yesterday, in fact hubby and I were debating about Jacks horns and will he look like daddy or mommy? But he looked so much like daddy I should have named him Buddy Jr. Jack and sissy ate fine that day and we left them eating. I was out and about, and back and fourth all day and he never showed any signs that he may leave us last night.

So in shock and in trying to calm down mom, oh poor mom walking around screaming for her boy. I removed Jack and put him in the green house for the night. I went back into the goat pen to check on Emma. She looked horrible, all swollen and just off alone didn't want anything to do with anyone. After much debate we brought Momma and Emma into the laundry room for the night. I wormed Emma and gave her a dose of Rescue Remedy. Something the vet gave me for times like this. We gave them cob which Emma loved and we called it a night.

As I'm laying in bed, mom is screaming, she does not want to be in the house. But you can't have one without the other right now. Emma is 15 weeks old tomorrow and they just lost Jack. So I have to deal with the screaming.

So as I'm laying there thinking, I'm thinking it's time to really test the power of prayer. I had been really wanting to test things but wanted to do it on something I could truly see the outcome. If that made any sense.

So I lay there and start praying for mom to quiet down and go to sleep. I prayed and prayed within 5 minutes mom had quieted down and went to sleep. I then prayed until I feel asleep that Emma would be OK come morning time. Because I can't loose Emma. And prayed that he would give me the guidance I needed to help out Emma.

So after a very short night I was awaken at 6:30am to both mom and Emma screaming and my oldest yelling from his room SHUT UP. Ethan finally got up and calmed down mom and then came in to get me saying they want out and that the baby is doing fine. I had Ethan give them a bit more cob until I could drag myself out of bed. At 7am finally getting up I took mom and Emma back out to the goat pen. I wormed Emma and mom and gave Emma some more Rescue Remedy and left them because my eyes didn't want to stay open.

At 10am I got up and went out to the goat pen to fine Emma full of energy and just bouncing around. She looked good. We then wormed all the goats, gave them grain and hay and put Emma away in the mom pen and gave her some cob and hay. She has a liking to grain I will tell ya.

Emma is now out of the mom pen as mom has broken her out, and I left it because she is eating with the big goats, her swelling is down and looking good. I will worm her again tomorrow and let it be. I will do more rescue remedy sometime today as I see fit.

On the other hand it was nice to see my prayers answered, well at least for now. I was told he needed Jack so he took Jack. I'm trying to be OK with that but it's hard loosing yet another baby. I told him I can't loose another because it tears out your heart. I helped deliver Jack and Emma in my laundry room. I'm out there a few times a day snuggling with them and making sure they are OK, it pains me to find that they have passed on with no real reason, they are just gone.

On the third hand I have been opening up myself more and more to prayer and more and more to listening and understanding. It's hard to know what you truly believe, I was raised with parents who didn't talk about God and so in all honestly I have no idea what they believe. My kids go to a Christian School and before I lived with it, now I"m OK with it. I want them raised with God in their lives. I want them to take life slow and to listen to God and listen to their inner selves.

So now I"m waiting on what I should do next with Emma. I'm praying I don't loose anyone else, I"m just praying for help and guide me through all of this.

You are so missed Jack...Jack is the one in the photo looking at the camera. He is snuggled with Emma, This photo was taken yesterday the same day he passed on.

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