Thursday, December 31, 2015


I don't know, I can't believe it's 2016 all ready? Got an in box full of all kinds of 2016 stuff today. Sigh. Well I make goals, but really there isn't much this year? Short of trying not to kill my neighbor? But that is another story.
My goals seem to be on going. We never buy new (so can't use that one). If we buy new it has to be 50-75% off. Oh we do buy new food. Although I really need to cut back on the food budget. So we have more gas money. I have one kid with braces coming up and that is freaking me out. I have one right behind him, and then I think I have a waiting period before the third. But Tucker is more urgent. He has such an over and under bite that he has so much trouble chewing and I can't tell ya how many times we have had to save him from choking. It's very scary. We should know in a few months if he is facing surgery.
I'm going to see if I can semi master my seeding and timing. As you can see I brought in the first light. I'm starting onions first. Going through seeds I don't need to buy seeds. Relief there. I'm just waiting for the dirt to warm up and so hopefully over the weekend get them going? 

Since I'm doing a garden this year, the rack will come in soon. About early Feb I will start tomatoes and peppers. Oh how I love peppers. well you all know my love for tomatoes. Speaking of tomatoes, I got my hands on Big Zac....If you don't know Big Zac he is a world record holder.

I don't know, I keep hoping oh this will be a good year, and it never is. I don't think this will be either. My hopes are not high. Maybe just hope for peace and calm? I'm tired of being so stressed out. I have so many quilt ideas stuck in my head, would love to get them out? But yeah when I'm stressed I'm not sewing. A cheap way to get fabric is buying sheets at goodwill when they are having a half off sale. Tip there. Because craft store solid colors are pricey.....And you can get yards and yards for about 2 dollars.
As you can tell, really not looking forward to the year ahead. So the post is a bit down. I do hope something good happens to lift our spirits and keep us going, but my hopes are not high. Hard to have hope when you are in a time frame of hit after hit. Something dies, you can't afford to replace, yet another hit to the budget here or there. Someone who has no clue about your life has a comment and it hurts. You try and shake it off and this something else comes up. Someone is rude or mean so it drags you down yet again. Try to get up and you are hit again. Frankly I'm just tired.
OH I know a good goal POST A FREAKING RECIPE! Get on the ball lady! How many minds did I just read?

Saturday, December 26, 2015

When Life Throws You Lemons

Your suppose to make Lemonade right? But what happens when you don't like lemonade then what? I don't mind lemon on fish, but life hasn't thrown me a fish yet?
We've had a crazy time lately with things dying around here. TV, computer, Bunny, hair clippers, vacuum, dishwasher. Oh I'm sure I'm missing a few? TV was under warranty and they did fix it. Computer is toast, warranty people won't talk to us with a CC we don't have a CC, so as of right now not replacing the computer. Bunny, well we buried him it was a long time coming, hair clippers I will be replacing. I save so much money cutting the boys hair, vacuum, I bought a broom, but I really need to buy a new vacuum, dishwasher, well we plugged the hole and prayed. We are saving a couple dollars a week and should be there by the end of next year?
Make me worry about what was to come.
Then you have life. My mother in law fell ill again, nothing like getting a call at 3m when you get home from work at 2am and just dropped into bed. Which got us thinking back to four years ago. Four years ago changed so much here. I fear the changes coming this time around. 

Four years ago, we or mostly I had to be at the rehab center every day at set times, and lots of running around. Going back and fourth from rehab to house to errands sometimes 2-4 times a day. We had to finally take a loan out for gas. Which in turn took about two years to pay off. My kids missed so much school, because I couldn't be at one place at one set time and be at another place at the same time. Something had to give and I had to keep pulling kids out of school to make this time and that time work. Which I'm happy to do, but the kids were suffering. It was one of the biggest factors into finally leaving school and home schooling.
Then I get crap about how the kids should be in school. I want to yell HOW? what is the point if they are going to miss so much school? Because I can't be here, and there picking them up? 

Then we have the Mortgage, I've been trying hard to pay it down, so we can either re-fi or move, both would reduce our payment. We need our payment reduced so we can afford our payment with out stressing every single month. We'll it was decided last summer lets try and move. We need a bigger house, as we are in such a tiny house and just tripping over each other. We need a bigger yard. As I grow nearly everything we eat. I need a canning room to store all the stuff I preserve that we eat, that I grow. Tired of having to dig under beds and couches to find foods. Going south would get us a bigger house with less mortgage. Hubby's job may be moving south, it was a win win.
But I think we have decided that a move at this moment is not in our future. Because moving 20-30 minutes south is not logical right now. That is adding 20-30 minutes to our 30 minute trip to the in laws. That doesn't make sense. Gas is going to kill us as it is. We will still look, but we have decided to throw our tax return at the mortgage and re-fi. Extend our mortgage back out to freaking 30 years. But we should have a payment we can afford, which would allow breathing room to have a few extra dollars for gas, so we are not going down the loan road again. I also hope that once a dishwasher is bought that, that 10-20 a week can start being put towards a second car. It's something that we will probably need down the road. 

When I think about the in laws, I think back about 15-17 years ago, I'm still damaged from that time. My Grandmother fell sick and she was basically dumped on me, because after all I was just looking for a job and that is nothing. So yeah I have all the time in the world to take care of her. It turned into two years of hell. Taking her to doctors appointments, surgeries, meals, errands. Even when I parked her at my parents, hoping for help, hum nope, you have to come out here and take care of her. If she needs a 2am pill you need to be here, BUT you can't stay here with her. No I was kicked out of the house at 19, probably because I was too old to beat with a belt? IDK. So not only taking care of her, I'm hunting for a job, I'm couch surfing. At times sleeping in the car because I couldn't stay at her place, she wanted to be independent. But have to turn around and be there so early. I would beg and plead for help, and get a nope. I finally get her on her feet, she is doing for herself. I get a job, I get an apartment and then the bottom falls out and she dies.
Although then funny how fast her kids showed up to search the place for a will and then how fast they left when they found it, realized she died in debt, and so I was blamed for the lack of money. Hum? you have a 62 year old, who is on ss, no retirement, she has to pay rent and a car payment, pay for her health insurance and everything. She would skimp on food to get by. So that was a nice fight, told them to check the bank account, in the end they realized I was right. I was never paid for a second of the time I gave her. I was loaned her car here and there, which I would sleep in from time to time, because I couldn't find a couch to crash on. I don't mind the non payment, but I do mind the lack of help I received from family. I haven't spoken to my Aunt or Uncles from that day since. Don't even know if they know if that I have kids? They have never met them.
But Karma does come around and my mother is living with Karma now, as she is going from surgery to surgery, I know she is doing it for the drugs. But she asked for help and I said no. I haven't been to her house in years. Good luck to ya.  There is more Karma coming and I fear it may hit later this week. Not the week I need it, but in my 40 years on earth she has never heard one word I have said, she will listen or she will be removed from my life all together. I don't need her to live. And the boys don't need a drunk Grandmother in their lives. As it is she only sees them 2-3 times a year as it is. You can't beat someone growing up, call them names, still today I'm called fat. Yeah that helps. You can't dump your mother on me and not help and then expect help when it comes your time? I have learned how to say no years ago. It's actually really easy now.
So we have a tough year ahead coming up. I feel it, I know it. Figure if we take it day to day we can try and get through it and hope the other side is better? Just hope God can give us the strength to get through each day.  Although there are times I wonder why God is dumping and dumping and dumping. What I wouldn't give for some good news to keep us going. 

Now to figure out what to do with these Lemons?

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Ready For Christmas

Well Buddy is...He has been sitting on presents under the tree. Although someone needs to break the news to him that not one of the gifts are for him????

These two kill me. The gray cat hates everyone, she is a one cat, well one animal house. But when she is the mood to take care of someone she curls up with them and loves on them. Other then that LEAVE HER ALONE. 

Well ready for Christmas here. Gifts are all bought and wrapped and under the tree. Kids are not getting much, the bulk of the gifts under the tree are gifts they made and gave each other. Which those gifts they get to open on the 24th. I'm excited about those this year, they really put some thought into the gifts.
Although we have been thrown some curve balls this week. Which will drag into next week and we have a crazy three weeks coming up. So Monday night, well Tuesday Morning, hubby gets home from work about 2am, about 2:30am we are finally dropping into bed. At 3am phones are going off. My mother in law was rushed to the hospital. So hubby after no sleep runs up to help get father in law to the hospital. He arrives home about 9am where he finally drops into bed. Mother in law got real sick real fast and it went to her lungs. It was caught fast this time, although tell ya she fought going to the hospital. Luckily with it caught fast, she should only be in the hospital for a few days.
She should be home sometime over the weekend. But next week, hubby will be up and back helping out. Mother in law needs to take it easy, so for the first week we are forcing help on her. She likes to over do it, so hubby help in the morning and an evening nurse until bedtime. Try and get her to take it easy for a week.
Our TV arrives back home tomorrow. So excited about that. We so have missed this thing. It's not like I watch it a lot, but been watching the stupid Christmas movies in the evening so have to drag the kids' TV back and fourth. 
Tomorrow we are home all day. Hubby home from work. I plan on a working on a new cracker recipe, and making a good dinner and just being quiet. 

Saturday, December 19, 2015

12/19/15 Candy Canes

This picture doesn't do this justice. These are 9 foot tall candy canes. Yes, 9 foot tall. It's 4 inch pvc pipe, you wrap red duct tape around and then the lights and boom you have a candy cane, although the top is a bit tricky, they are 4 inch curve pieces, glued together. I found these first on pinterest and if I hadn't lost my other computer I would supply you with the website I got the idea from! But to me they look stunning and just something that no one else has.
Although light wise it has been about all we can do this year. Lack of funds, our minds are else where.
December has totally side lined us. Loosing the computer has cut our swags in half, So having to get Lego's from our budget. Budget tight as it was so that stops money from going to the house. So our Mortgage really hasn't dropped, our savings really hasn't gone up. Been kinda at a stand still.
We have a couple big purchases we need to do for the house. So probably put x amount aside a week for that and start going down the list. Would be nice to not need to do anything when we go to sell the house. Just be ready to list.

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Updating 12/8/15

Well, about three weeks ago our TV died. Sitting here watching a silly Christmas movie, not paying any attention when I look up and it's a black screen. After some googling it's probably the inverter. Going for about 60 on Amazon. BUT the TV is under warranty so we went that route first. Called Costco and they sent us to the company. A freaking three week run around and we were finally able to send off our TV yesterday. Now because of the flooding it was stalled in Portland, as of tonight it's on a truck heading to GA. At this rate I won't be seeing the TV before Christmas. The kids loan me theirs in the evening so we are ok. 

So not in the Christmas spirit. Life isn't a Christmas movie that is for sure. Nope, it's stress, things breaking, money issues, rainy season, wet dogs, dying bunny, no time for anything, sewing, sewing and more sewing. Squeezing in school. And wishing time would stop because seed catalogs are starting to roll in.
Been racking my brain on what to make for the neighbor boy, when this idea finally landed in my lap, thanks manly to the fabric. What child doesn't want a batman cape? Like seriously? The child is three so it's a bit small on my ten year old. 

I wasn't going to do anything for baby brother, but hum how does one not do a bib in the same fabric? Almost wanted another baby, oh batman bibs, and batman diapers??? But then reality hits, and that baby thing passes, very quickly. 

I have sewed to many things so more photos are coming. I have created slug terra stuff animals, and about to do slug terra pillows. Two blaster holders, yeah no idea. In the midst of a quilt. Oh boy. Although the kids keep adding projects to my list. OH a pillow case tonight.
So Cole was flying the other night. 

Sam is doing well, well as well as he can. Flea issues, we are consently working on. Nothing is working on this dog. We are now doing a dawn bath every other day, and coated in natural flea stuff. It semi works for him. Along with cleaning his eyes daily. He pretty much has run of the house now. He has his set blankets in certain spots. He likes to sleep in the laundry room, where Tucker finds him in the morning and potties him. They take him to the playroom until I get up. Then his box is dragged to the living room where he either keeps sleeping or goes over by the couch. After a long nap, he gets fed and usually ends up in the laundry room until kids go to bed, then he is glued to my feet until it's feeding time again and bed time. And the cycle starts again. If he does something odd you rush him outside, it's pee or poop time. 

So not ready for Christmas. Even with us starting early on Lego's we are far behind. Losing the computer hurt. So the swags just are not there, so have to take the Lego's out of budget, and budget just can't do it. Still have four more sets to buy. So paying down the house is taking a big hit right now. We had to pay for packing to ship the TV back. The dishwasher is so close to dead. We are working on re-installing the second bathroom. Got the new toilet in. Only took two extra trips to Home Depot. We thought we had a leak, but it must be from turning on that water after so long? Now to get the new vanity in.
But taking hit after hit to the budget. I don't see it letting up until after Christmas. So going with it.
So can't wait to have my own sewing room one day. You don't want to see the living room. My small sewing area has exploded. I am working on this quilt and I want it all laid out, and can't. I have flannel everywhere, from sewing Tucker new pj's and such. Sigh.